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Vince-rainI Do Believe. February 17 Happy New YearIt's been a long time, since the last time i dropped by my own space. The last time was in last year. Last year, the word which whenever was spoken will bring some sentiment of nostalgia gave me some reason to really think twice on the years that has past.
How time flies. It was my junior middle school that brought this word to me. Yeah, i have been using it time and time again. What's different every time is the feeling after speaking.
People change with the day, the night and the time. As the day passes, values, perspectives, strategies, plans even principles all can be changed or modified and then proceed again. The still of such stuff can never happen. All can and wil change, just the question of when where and how.
I know there's some kind of something in this world that can change everything. Maybe there's more. But i just know one of them. The name of it, is love.
Maybe it is too childish for a twenty-year-old girl to say love. Maybe it is not carefully or thoroughly considered when spoken. Still I know there is love that does fit the "compliment" mentioned above. It is not compliment but truth, for sure.
I never feel so sure about it.
The love i have witnessed for the entire life, 20 years, assures me of its truth. What mama wants is so firm and so simple: Happy everyday. Mama used to tell me happiness is not easy. It may come difficult. But she wanted it. Honestly, i didn't understand when i was still a kid. However, now, as a girl that has kind of grown up, i realize what happiness covers: good health of people you love, nice income&financial management, the love you give and receive...
Happiness does not come easy.
Still, i know it more clear this time when i am home. Daddy will feel so happy when i really talk about something with him, mummy will be so glad when i share the experience and spend time with her and good health of mine. So simple. The reture they ask for is so little that i am speechless, about everything. Maybe, everything i want to do is to make them happy.
I love you dad and mum.
Yeap, maybe you were right dad when you suggested me chosing economics as my major while i sticked to my opinion 'cause i wanted to walk my own road myself; maybe you were right mum, when you hurried me everytime to hurry up and fix the most important problem;yes, you were right when both of you talked me off that tutoring job. You were right. It was not worthy.However, who knows which is right while the other is wrong? who can tell the future?Life is a gamble. Every step you make may become the turn point in your life. So who am i going to listen to?
Yes. It is right that sometimes some word may change your decision then different your life. It is not that abstract but visible and provable. This time, i know i am going to take your advice, 'cause i trust my instinct&your experience when i can not foresee it. But what i still need is persuasion. Instinct may be accurate but not logical. It can not analyzed. It is not science. I do trust my instinct, but i trust logic more, i trust science. But don't worry honey. All i need is time that allows me to trace the answer. But don't worry honey. I will take action right away 'cause my instinct has informed me of its fittness on me:) Just don't worry. All i need to do is to persuade myself :)
Wish the future better and better. Bright brand life wish at the end of 2006 & the start of 2007 in terms of lunar calendar. To you and to me.
Happy new year. November 07 承诺的重量承诺很重。想起周日那天有史以来参加过的最长的会议中，一位不知名的学生代表说的那句，我很害怕承诺，也害怕别人向我承诺。
自己呢？
一直以来，从小到大，怕是一直都在承诺的。可能朝夕相伴就会成为习惯。我并不感觉承诺又多大的压力，当然，不是仅仅的口头承诺就算了。承诺是需要被践证的。
但是，今天中午接到爸爸的短信时，回了一条短信，就皱着眉头流泪了。短信里的最后一句说，相信我，爸爸。
19年来，我从来没有对父亲说过这样的话。从来没有这么正式的叫过，爸爸。一直以来，不是叫老爸就是叫爸。绝对是没有过今天这样。
回复短信的时候是12点半。走过操场要去学五吃午饭。突然就想起高考知道成绩之后抱着爸爸哭了。那时，父亲也哭了。那是我记忆中第一次看见他流泪。三年的辛苦，是不会白费的。在那一刻，除了泪水，大脑里唯一能够感应到的理智，就是这句话。
我知道，他们很爱很爱我，疼爱到如果要把心掏出来都心甘情愿。所以，我一直在很努力的，我不要让他们担心。否则，就是我不能忍受的。我觉得自己能够忍受很多东西，能够坚强得挺过很多事情，然后能够倔强的往前走。但是我却不能接受来自他们的任何一种心碎。所以，我答应过妈妈，我会好好的。
很多时候我都不知道应该如何写报答两个字。好像很简单，她们要的东西很简单，要我好好的学习，生活，工作，快快乐乐的。这样他们就会笑了。所以我答应过自己，我会好好的。
好晚了。他们都应该睡得好香了。 闭上眼睛，在梦中告诉他们，我在想你们了。
中午给爸爸回复短信的时候，流泪了。走在大街上，空荡荡的校道，所以眼泪更加肆无忌惮。爸爸，正如你很多事情都自己藏在心里一样，我不会告诉你的，不会告诉你在给你回复这条短信的时候，泪水先从我的右眼眶中滑落，流过脸颊，下到下巴，然后落下。
原来承诺可以分很多种。
相信我，爸爸。
晚安。
October 17 最喜欢一句，我会勇敢的。页面跳转得好慢，以至于想快些上来，匆匆说上几句，再下去都显得有些不耐烦。
这段日子很感谢很多人。为着很多彼此都知道的理由，也为着很多对于他们不构成理由的理由。我除了感谢，不知道该说些什么。尽管说过，用结果来报答是最好的方法，但是，许多事情，常常说不明白，看不透彻。等待，也许是one optional choice.
刚才毛毛打电话到宿舍，急着帮小竞找手机。“都快急死我了”，他在那边嚷着。在我很冷静地告诉他，小竞忘了带出去之后，他才松了口气。幸福的一对呢~ 真好^^
大三的日子来不及让我去考虑很多事情，或者说，去关注一些细微的事情，而这些事情，往往从深去看，能让人沉静、思考。
今天下午才惊讶的发现席慕容。这个才华横溢充满灵气的女子。也才刹那间看见，那首似曾相识的诗，是出于她的笔下。这首诗，很喜欢呵。精致纯真，让人心酸令人心碎。
一棵开花的树
席慕容
如何让你遇见我
在我最美丽的时刻，为这
我已在佛前，求了五百年。
求他让我们结一段尘缘。
佛于是把我化作一棵树，
长在你必经的路旁，
在阳光下慎重地开满了花，
朵朵都是我前世的盼望。
当你走近，请你细听，
颤抖的叶是我等待的热情。
而当你终于无视的走过，
在你身后落了一地的，
朋友啊，那不是花瓣，
是我凋零的心。
不知道该继续说些什么，
或许，
只有沉默。
October 03 假期好a~给我五分钟吧。我在这上面写些东西。
稿子还是没有写完。但今晚必须出稿。没有理由。必须。
其实在某些时候，心里会偷偷地告诉自己，不想写了...但是不想写不代表不想要...是自己变懒了/ 我知道这样不好。可是我总能找到一点点借口。或者说，不是借口的借口。
今天，准确地说，该是昨天开始，就很想回家了。中午洗衣服的时候发现，过节不回家是我不能接受的。但是，如果必须要接受呢？
今上午给阿婉短信说，你不想回家啊。想让她过来让我不要这么想回去...可是,收到她的短信上讲：我今下午三点的车回家。阿婉都回去了，妈妈知道该是念叨了罢，我本这么想，原是更加郁闷的。然而，老爸的短信却来的干脆:你自己好好照顾自己吧~ 我们不过去看你了~ - -! 汗，是我爸爸吗！老妈在电话里头竟然也一句“啊我女儿回来吧”都没有。弄得我干脆不想回去算了。
阿婉回去了，瑜瑜回去了，金回去了，小美回去了，小亮回去了，smallhong不知所踪，大头蝶明天回家，丁丁不知去向，阿沁几百年不来个信...宿舍里，阿丽玩去了，小竞浪漫去了，阿英去哥哥那了，只剩下小霞和可怜的我
本想着抓紧做完手头的东西，抽个空回家看看吧。没想到，婷婷过来一句话，就把我念头打消了：哎~ 明天图书馆开门，总算可以看看书了！
哦，图书馆哦~~ 嗯，既然学校里都有家，家就不用回了吧~ 呵呵
我亲爱的爸爸妈妈外公外婆表弟表妹，加上一堆不是特别有良心的朋友们，假期里要好好的过啊！嘿嘿，我会想你们的，名字这里就不一一赘述了^^
好！ 搞定稿子！！不过在那之前，让我在网上晃荡一下吧~ 哈哈 |
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